Brief Bio:
Joan grew up in New York state with a strong faith in Judaism. She worked as a scientist for a biotechnology company for 15 years before going on to start two companies with her husband. In addition to being a researcher, entrepreneur and angel investor, she currently uses her science expertise to help startup life science companies.
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Joan and I (interviewer) met in the gazebo at her beachfront home in Massachusetts. The summer sun was out with a cool breeze blowing in from the ocean. I could hear the faint sound of waves gently collapsing on the sand. Joan was wearing a sleeveless blue shirt, her hair tied in a ponytail with silver rings in her ears. She seemed perfectly suited for the setting. Her reading glasses were perched on her nose as she skimmed the draft questions that I hoped would provide some structure for our interview. She looked a little pensive and later told me she wondered how she’d get through all the questions. Our friendship has spanned over 30 years, from sharing pizza over glasses of Merlot, talking about science and movies, exchanging stories about mutual friends and catching up on events in our lives. Yet, at this moment, I realized that there was also much that we just hadn’t really talked about. This is what Joan shared with me about her life experiences straddling science, faith and religion.
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I was born and grew up in a town in Upstate New York. Back then, like most other Upstate New York towns, industry was leaving. You had the sense that your future wouldn’t be there, that it would be someplace else.
My parents were both college-educated. My mother was a math teacher and had a very strong personality. She really believed in women’s rights and equality. After she got married, initially she stayed home with my brother and me, but she didn’t enjoy it. She eventually got her teaching certification and went back to work. I could see that she was not happy when she wasn’t working and that was not what I’d want for myself either.
My sister and I were brought up feeling we were as good as the boys and as good as my brother. It was a necessity for women to go out in the world, important to have a career. It wasn’t about “whatever you want to do is fine, that being a housewife is fine!” While my mother was opinionated, she was also very loving, very proud of us and wanted us to have successful careers.
My father was a pharmacist and also very supportive. Both my parents favored science and technology careers over the arts. I loved taking dance lessons. But I also went to Hebrew school 5 days a week. It was not an option to choose dance lessons instead of Hebrew school. So even from a very early age I imagined having some type of profession, like being a doctor, a university professor or an engineer, not an artist or a dancer.
I was always good at school, I enjoyed it and it was nice having that affirmation with good grades. When I was really young, I remember collecting rocks. We also always had dogs. My sister from the earliest times wanted to be a veterinarian; she never wanted to be a doctor and didn’t play with dolls. With our dogs, I remember thinking about genetics, how different traits were inherited in animals but also in people. I loved our pets and that got me thinking that animal behavior and psychology were interesting. All kinds of science were interesting to me.
My mother was a little disappointed that none of her children wanted to be mathematicians. She loved mathematics. Early on she became interested in computer science. She knew computers were going to take over the world. At one time she thought she’d be a kindergarten teacher, but I can’t even imagine that as she was not that kind of person. Anyway, she was an education major in college, and when she went back to school for her masters, she majored in math education. She later taught advanced placement math at the high school level. She also became the high school’s Math Club advisor. New York had two major computer companies, IBM and UniVac; the Math Club would take field trips to visit the two companies. Those days, computers were huge; each one filled an entire room.
My mother later taught computer science at the college level. She enjoyed writing code. I remember her saying “Someday we’ll all be writing on computers rather than on paper;” we’d say “Ma…. nah!” She was just really into math and computer science. She was a little disappointed I turned to biology, my sister to veterinary medicine and my brother to engineering, which was kind of the closest to math. She would have liked one of us to have become a mathematician.
When I went to college, I struggled my first year. Part of it was due to religious observances and part of it was about learning how to study effectively. Initially my grades weren’t that great. I had chemistry and calculus courses that were difficult. I also took Psychology 101 which I loved. So I called home and said to my parents, “I’m changing my major, I don’t want to be pre-med anymore, I want to do psychology.” My parents replied “Oh if you don’t think you are up to it…..” It was clear that they felt I was taking the easy way out. Psychology was not a “real science”, it was for people who couldn’t make the grades. So, I didn’t change my major. I didn’t want to disappoint my parents.
Both sides of the family were Jewish, but my father’s side was more religious. My mother’s parents lived with us; my father’s parents were a bit older and lived across town. We’d go over there for Sunday dinner and religion was very important to them. My father’s father was one of the founders of the temple we belonged to. My grandparents were happy that I was interested in religion. I guess I had that interest early on, more so than my siblings did.
My mother’s side of the family weren’t as observant. Their attitude was “Keeping kosher isn’t that important, the holidays aren’t that important, you don’t always have to attend services. The rules can be bent.” My father’s side was different. It was important to them to follow the rules, keep the house kosher and to celebrate the holidays.
There was a small but robust Jewish community in our town when I was growing up. Early on I went to a Jewish nursery school and while in elementary school I attended Hebrew school 2 days a week. I also went to Shabbat services on Saturday and to Sunday school; these were not negotiable with my parents; I had to go. For a time, at age 11 or 12, I became rebellious questioned why I couldn’t do other activities, like my friends, who were cheerleaders, for example. My days were too packed to fit that in.
Nonetheless, I did find Hebrew school interesting. In addition to learning the prayers, we learned Hebrew, Jewish history, religious customs and practices. I appreciated that I was learning about the world in a different way from what I was taught in public school. Hebrew school was more intensive, and often more intellectually challenging.
When I reached middle school, I started going to Jewish sleep away camp. The camp was run by the Conservative Movement and had a structured program. All the announcements were in Hebrew and many of the councilors were Israeli. We woke up early; had to make the bed and pass inspection, then went for morning prayers before breakfast. We had classes after breakfast, then a short service before lunch. After lunch we had sports, swimming, arts and crafts like other camps. At first, I was homesick, being away from home for two full months. However, I soon grew to love camp. I loved the girls in my bunk. I had my first boyfriend there. We learned a lot of Hebrew songs and dances and at campfires in the evenings would often discuss the challenges of being a modern Jew.
The religious training resonated with me. I learned the prayers well. To this day, I’m comfortable with going into a new synagogue and being able to follow the service in Hebrew. It makes me feel focused, calm and connected. After I got older and moved away, when I came back came to visit my parents, we’d go to Friday night services together. It felt right being with family and together in the synagogue. I didn’t feel that God was present or that praying would help me get to heaven. It more made me feel part of a long tradition, and that was reassuring.
After attending summer camp for a couple years, I wanted to be more observant when I came home. I wanted to be “shomer Shabbat” (no working, cooking riding, etc. on Saturday), be stricter about kashrut (dietary rules) at home. However, my parents weren’t having it; they had a more practical sense of religion. My father told me “you know, Joan, one can be too Jewish and that’ll make it hard to live in the world”.
Obviously, I always knew I was going to College and that I was going to be a science major. It was just a matter of where I’d go. I was going to be pre-med but where to apply to college?
When I graduated from High School, many of the top schools like the Ivies, were male only. I probably applied to Radcliffe and Vassar but not to Wellesley which was unfortunate as they had given me a science prize. I regretted not applying there but my parents weren’t that wealthy, and I thought about how much college would cost. My brother was in college at the same time which was also a consideration. New York State had Regents scholarships, and if you were awarded one, you could attend any college that was part of the system tuition-free. That is what I did. I picked a school that was in a different part of the state. My parents were happy that I was going to be far away from home; they were tired of my challenging their authority and giving them attitude. They also felt I would benefit from being on my own a little more.
The school had a new campus and the state was pouring a lot of money into the system at that time. It was an exciting time to be a going to college.
In High School, I was always in all the Advanced Placement, AP, classes. I worked hard, but I also found it easy. When I went to college, the majority of the students were from the New York City area, and many had attended the specialized high schools in the city, like Bronx Science, Stuyvesant, Brooklyn Tech. They were very smart, had completed high level coursework, and were super-competitive. They came on gang busters. I wasn’t used to being in large lectures and with students that so outspoken and aggressive. I had to develop better study habits. It took me a full semester to find my footing.
Initially when I went to college, I was into the religious thing, so I joined the Hillel, the Jewish student organization. I’d go to their services, but I didn’t really fit in or like the kids who were there. And about women — in Judaism back then, even in the Conservative Movement, religious practices were very strictly defined along gender lines. It was changing and has changed a lot since then. It was unusual that I had a Bat Mitzvah, but even so, I wasn’t allowed to learn to read Torah. My father had to be called up with me to say the blessings.
In college, the Hillel group was very traditionally observant and cliquish. They would only socialize amongst themselves, and certainly not with students who weren’t Jewish. They had an “us against them” mentality. Science wasn’t a big major among the Hillel group back then. There was only one dining hall on campus that served kosher food and all the Hillel members would eat there. I initially was on the kosher food plan, but honestly the food was gross. And I missed eating with my non-Jewish friends. After one semester I gave up on the kosher food plan and on Hillel.
On the other side, although many of the of the science faculty were Jewish, most were not observant. Many were dismissive or even hostile towards religion. Their attitude was “You can’t believe that mumbo jumbo; there’s no scientific basis.” You wouldn’t think of discussing religion with a science faculty member, and you didn’t expect them to be sympathetic about your missing classes or labs because of holiday observances.
The SUNY schools were very liberal then. It was the late 60s/early 70s and there were a lot of student protests on issues like the Vietnam War and the military industrial complex. On our campus, for some courses if you got arrested during a protest, you’d get an A. That was more common in social science and humanities courses, but it did happen. In the physical sciences you were usually expected to show up for labs and lectures.
I was busy and had a lot of classes and lab courses. I remember my first year the High Holy Days fell in September, with Rosh Hashanah for two days and ten days later, Yom Kippur for a 24-hour period and then a string of other holy days, I observed all of them and got totally behind. I had to make up all the labs I had missed. I then realized that I had to make the choice, either I’m Jewish or I’m a scientist. With lab work, you’d have to go in on Saturdays sometimes to work through an experiment. So after having a pretty disastrous first semester, I toned down my religious observance and made science the priority.
I started college as a pre-med major thinking that’s what people who like biology do. Growing up, I didn’t know any experimental scientists. Once I started taking biology lab courses, I fell in love with working in the lab. I loved scientific method, starting with a hypothesis, doing the experiments, analyzing the results, writing up the conclusions. I thought this is great—so much better than sitting in an office and seeing patients. I found I didn’t like physiology lab because it involved experimentation on rodents and frogs. I preferred genetics, and biochemistry.
I loved being in college. Not only could I study science, but I could also take humanities courses. I loved going to concerts, poetry readings and theater performances. I thought what could be better than being an academic and spending your whole life on a college campus? I decided I wanted to become a university professor.
Back then, career choices were more limited. There were research jobs at universities, medical schools and research laboratories, but there wasn’t a vibrant biotech industry yet. Back then taking a position in industry to do applied research wasn’t as exciting or prestigious as doing “pure research”.
Also in the 60s and 70s, we were in the space race. Science and math were promoted, the government was pouring a lot of money in research. It felt at that time that “everything was possible”, I really felt that. After Sputnik went up, we all felt “we can get out there with the race to the moon.” People believed in technology and that science was going to make the world a better place; that was definitely the feeling. It was also the beginning of the Women’s Movement. Young women felt empowered, that they needed to contribute. There was Betty Friedan’s book “The feminine mystique” and people like Gloria Steinem and with the space race, all those things together, coming out of WW2 and the ‘50s and the enthusiasm of young people, all the baby boomers, we felt that there were so many of us and we could do all these things and make a difference in the world.
However, at that time, it was still difficult being a woman in science. In general, you really had to be totally committed to your work or people would doubt you and assume the cliché of “You’re going to get married; you’re just looking for a husband.” That becomes exhausting, always having to prove your dedication to your work.
Also, another thing, there was so much sexual harassment in a way that wasn’t even thought of as sexual harassment. You’re in a lab for a class and the teaching assistant, typically a senior male graduate student, would hit on you; that was just the way it was. It wasn’t unusual to hear about a graduate or undergraduate student sleeping with a professor, it’s part of what would go on. Being an active feminist in the lab wasn’t popular. You had to focus on what was important to you, your education, and couldn’t be side-tracked on these issues or spend time campaigning against injustices.
As an undergraduate, I really loved genetics and the professor who taught my course became a mentor to me. I would go into his office to talk to him about science and eventually he began telling me personal things like how couples when they are together a long time can start to grow apart. I would think “why is he telling me this?” He would hit on me but luckily at the time I was so naive it didn’t register. When I look back, I was asking him for advice about graduate schools, but he had that mindset that I would be getting married and my science career would be secondary. I asked him “Where should I apply to grad school” and he actually replied “Well, where’s your boyfriend going?” It didn’t even occur to me that it was inappropriate. There weren’t many women on the faculty to ask for their advice; in fact, the women were often research assistants, several in their husband’s lab which was also a bad role model. “Oh, I see this is going to be my future, I’m going to be my husband’s lab assistant.”
When I was an undergraduate, we had large lecture classes for most of my science and math courses. I didn’t think to go down to the front of the lecture hall after classes and make myself known to the professor. It’s something I now tell students to do—talk to the professors and build a rapport. Tell them “this is what I want to do with my life” and ask their advice. That wasn’t suggested or encouraged either. I thought if I did well and got good marks, I would rise to the top and be successful.
I didn’t apply to a top tier grad school even though I had good grades and a lot of lab experience. My undergarduate advisor didn’t give me any guidance on how to choose a grad school, and I wasn’t confident or savvy enough to apply. I ended up at a small private university with a good research program but not high profile.
While I was there in the 70s, gene cloning was getting hot and I soon switched my focus to molecular biology. The idea of being able to take a gene from one organism and put it into another organism and get it to express, all of it just blew my mind and took my breath away. There were so many exciting things happening in science.
Graduate school was different from my undergraduate experience. Initially I took all types of courses; I signed up for film courses and took dance courses, and one day, my advisor came to me and said, “This isn’t what graduate school is about, this is like an apprenticeship. You can’t be a dilettante; you need to concentrate. You need to buckle down, spend more time in the lab and get your thesis research done. Otherwise you’ll never be done.” He felt I hadn’t committed or understood what it meant to be completely devoted to working in the lab.
I really did buckle down and finished up my lab work. Writing my thesis was another big challenge, but I finally completed and successfully defended it. I felt I needed postdoctoral training; that’s what you had to do back then, and it’s still often the case. I did postdoctoral work at a private research institute, and then started looking for a fulltime position. It was the ’80s I was looking for universities which had molecular biology and where I could go and be comfortable as a Jewish single female scientist. Positions were available but they were in places that seemed remote to me, like the Midwest or Southwest. I couldn’t see myself living in College Station, Texas or Ames, Iowa, which didn’t have sizable Jewish communities. By that time, the biotech industry had really kicked off. I was excited about being a part of this new industry where there were a lot of opportunities. Most of the new companies were located either around Boston or San Francisco. I interviewed at a few companies in San Francisco but felt it was culturally too different. Therefore, I decided to take a position at a company near Boston.
After my freshman year, through my undergraduate, graduate and postdoctoral years, my religious practice took a back seat to my scientific training. I still would observe major holidays, mainly with my family or with classmates, but I didn’t attend services regularly.
During that period, from the 70s onward, the women’s movement was having an impact on Judaism. Women were being ordained as rabbis and lay women were taking a more active role in observances.
I was very Jewish in many ways, but I was always ambivalent about dating. I had Jewish and also non-Jewish boyfriends. My parents were also conflicted in their feelings about my boyfriends. I had my first boyfriend in sleep-away camp. Since it was a Jewish camp, he was Jewish. My parents were concerned because they felt I was too young to be thinking about boys. When I was a high school senior and my first year of college, I dated a Christian Scientist from my hometown. My father especially liked him despite his not being Jewish. I broke up with him and started dating a Jew, but my father never really liked that Jewish boyfriend, probably blaming him for my breaking up with the former boyfriend.
Judaism, at least the reform and conservative movements, have changed their position about interfaith dating and marriage. The conservative movement still won’t perform any interfaith marriages, although the Reform movement will. In my synagogue, over half the members are in interfaith relationships, and the other congregants often don’t know which of the partners is Jewish. My husband isn’t Jewish; however he’ll come to services or to social events at our synagogue and has made many close friends among the congregants.
To this day, there is a constant balancing between my faith and my science especially when work activities butt up against each other. A good example is working on a Saturday. I’ve made my peace with not going for services every Saturday, that’s OK. I always try to attend Shabbat services at least once a month. I wouldn’t let work interfere with my observing the High Holidays. Or for Passover, I would have to go to a Seder and eat special food; I wouldn’t go away to a conference at that time.
I guess, my religion is something that provides a sense of groundedness. Sometimes just thinking about and saying a prayer and knowing people from a thousand years ago were saying the same prayer and recognizing that you’re somehow connected to them, that’s very powerful. Going to services with other congregants, spending a few hours cut off from the outside world saying familiar prayers, being quietly contemplative, is restorative.
I remember once I was giving a talk at a Hadassah meeting (a Jewish women’s organization) about my career. I was asked “Is it hard being Jewish and a scientist?” I thought about it and replied, “It’s actually harder being a female and a scientist”. That’s the harder part, and unfortunately, I don’t think it’s improved that much. There’s still a lot of work that needs to be done on that front.
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